Not Again

Another overly warm day for March, in this, the year of no real winter at all, and it seems the birds, after a relatively bug free winter diet, are totally focused in their search for more and more of the constantly emerging tasty little morsels. So unknown to us, they wander off down to the field, heads down and happily pecking away, no doubt following the pond run off that not only leads straight through the field, but is chock a block full of bird goodies as well.

the goody loaded trench that leads birds from the safety of trees to the dreaded field

.........and then it happened.....another hawk attack, witnessed this time, so NO, we are NOT crazy, that is what’s picking off our birds.

I'm inside when my phone rings, Bob the Builder on the other end, calling from the field and telling ( yelling ) for me to get down there quick because he needs help.......this is from a guy who notoriously does NOT ask for help, even when he should, so I'm picturing the worst.  

In a matter of seconds this blissful bug picking adventure has turned into a chaos zone. One of the as yet un-named chickens is injured, missing a load of feathers and hiding under a tree, either Joan or Elvira was last seen running for all her worth to the cover of the spruces with a hawk on her tail, Ruckus the Rooster and the other two girls are nowhere to be found. Bob's gotten a shot off and the hawk was diverted and flown off, but the chicken may or may not know that.

And the 3 remaining ducks have FINALLY found the river......we have been hoping that they would find the river someday and make that their new home, saving us the whole Duckponics issue, so I quickly abandoned the idea of getting them back, seems we finally had them just where we wanted them and they were joyfully discovering all kinds of goodies in the tall grass on the banks. So I was happy thinking there's some good in everything.

Injured chicken then proceeds to give me a really good run for for my money, through what little ( wet, heavy, slushy ) snow that remains amidst all the mud, trying to keep her from frantically running straight into the river, because I'm pretty sure that even though that river may be a ducks dream, it's got to be chicken hell, and I had NO intention of jumping in to get her even if I could catch her in that current. If it came to that, I would probably have better luck running all the way back up the hill from hell, getting in the car and scooping her out at the first bridge down the road with the fish net that I was really wishing I had brought down here right now. So I just kept running.........and so did she, in no particular direction, but all of them taking her closer to the river. In the end, she was captured, without the help of the fish net. So there I was, soaked and muddy from the knees down, sweating from the waist up, trying to get control of a flapping, hysterical chicken that was making enough noise to call in every predator in the township at that point. I finally calmed her down and I think the two of us just sat there wondering which one of us was going to have the heart attack first. 

So we now have one chicken headed for the coop to hopefully recover, Elvira is MIA, Ruckus and the 2 other girls were found hiding in the garage and 3 ducks finally in the river.

3 hours later...........injured hen is getting severely picked on by the others, so they are all locked out for the night, injured has the coop, the rest of them have the run, good thing it’s warm out, but who knows where tomorrows eggs are going to be. MIA chicken managed to sneak back home without anyone noticing, and she seems just fine. All is calm again, just hoping that injured chicken makes it through the night.

AND THEN THE DUCKS CAME HOME.........................I really think that sometimes they just pretend to be stupid.

Soooo the wrong footwear

OK. so, tested and proved ( like there was ever any doubt )

CROCS are SO NOT the right footwear for winter, no matter how short the trip is supposed to be, cuz once you set out there in them……….it’s going to be an uncomfortable and much longer trip than you expected.

Never mind the obvious………. holes on top that scoop snow down into your toes, the same holes that scoop top soil into the same place all summer, but between them, and the "who decided to put the chicken coop down hill" factor……………yup, slide ride it was, missed the duck pond, landed safely at the bottom, sporting a muddy butt and snowy toes.

So this was supposed to be just a quick trip to let the chickens out, but now I’m at the bottom of the hill, wearing pretty much a pair of highly ventilated jelly beans on my feet and I still have to get back up……….apparently, among other things, to dig out my ever so fashionable (NOT) heavy duty grippy soled winter boots from summer storage.

So when I do get back up there, I start to wonder ……….why do I own these things.

I mean really, they are not at all attractive, the grippy soled snow boots put them to shame in that department. Summer or winter, something is falling through those holes to wedge or melt between your toes. They come in the most ridiculous colors, mine are purple……mauve if you want to get all fashionista about it…and if that’s the case, your whole fashion sense needs to be evaluated.............. by a therapist.

If you do wear them for a full weekend, they give you the silliest sandal tan…….a week of polka dot feet. The same holes that did that, I know what they are supposed to do, but they don’t, your feet still sweat like a pig………well not in the snow I guess, but freezing is just as uncomfortable, if not more.

So why do I own them???

Well they are pretty much go anywhere, don’t need to stop for a footwear change, into the river, out of the river, across the field, into the garden, go scoop manure,  indestructible, and if you do destruct them, who cares, kind of shoes. They also work well in the kitchen as a built in stress mat.

Other than that…….they suck, but I’m keeping then anyways.

A comedian once said about them "there are people all over the world wearing fanny packs that are laughing at you"

I think of that every time I put them on, and make damn sure I take them off before I leave the property.

　

　

As for the ducks..........

Nut Date…… Oct 18,2011

As for the ducks.....................well Holy Sh*t !!

.........pardon the language, but that’s all we are getting from them.

I guess that was part of the original plan, $3.00 duck, bug control and free manure, so far they are holding up their end of the manure part NO PROBLEM... as for the bug control, well they have just now found the field that holds the bugs that are eating hundreds of dollars worth of fruit trees, good timing, the bugs are sleeping for the winter, it’s Canada........... and all summer, rather than eating the slugs that attack my $13.00 Hostas, they ate the Hostas……..bug problem there solved, in their minds anyways.

So they stopped sleeping in the $1000.00 Quacker Box we built for them months ago, preferring the pond, spending the night floating about with their head tucked under one wing, looking really cute, but apparently filling it up with manure ALL NIGHT LONG. I’ve heard they have no sphincter at the south end, and I now don’t doubt that at all.

The reality is, that despite our best efforts at creating a nice calming eco – friendly, self sustaining pond, we now have to run hydro to pump it out. $$$$

So let’s just tally this up,

nine $3.00 ducks… $27.00,
bag of feed, $16.00 / month
Quacker Box with heat and lighting ( hydro ) $1000.00 +++
Pond pump, $30.00 ( I think, probably way more )
Pipes to access fresh spring water……….$ ??? another $30, let’s just say
Rental on mini excavator to dig hole for fresh spring water ( that was stuck in the mud for most of the rental, but did in the end dig the hole ) ..$50.00
Pond liner, sand, gravel, rocks, plants……salvaged, reclaimed or recycled from other jobs.

The whole system of sand filters, spring water and plant filtration, all for a duck pond, working wonderfully, till you make the fatal mistake of adding ducks………… freakin’ PRICELESS !!!


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Don't they all just look sooooo happy !!!
merrily pooping away

I’ve since learnt that this issue is called "Duckponics"

Whodathunkit??

Duckponics is actually a word. ??!! Well, probably not according to Webster’s ( yet ), but to anyone who owns a duck…………..it’s not just a word, it’s a reality that needs to be dealt with,
and to my relief, I’m not alone.

There is some comfort in numbers I guess.

Camera instead of keyboard

Apparently I took some time off from the keyboard and picked up the camera to keep track of these little guys...............here's a small photo log of their growth.

And as crazy as it seems to want to take pictures of your chickens.............. I'm not alone with that, and here's someone that is way better at it than me........I just can't get them to stay still long enough and fight off the dogs for attention to do any better than this.





see, we can all get along



stop wiggling...........



get down funky town



it's a big world out there when you're  this small



oh look............a bath!!



see now, if BatGirl would just stop lickin her lips like that, we'd let her go in



more dog patrol



you're still wigglin'



food, food,.....food............food, food



dog patrol on the newer bigger better bath



oh it really is a big world.............we'll have to mow this down!!!



Hosta.....I smell Hosta!!! food, food ......food........



sometimes being a teenager is not the best lookin time in your life



food, food......oh crap, we already ate all those hostas



Little Lucy.............tough decision, food or socialize



Citronella



and the boys are finally showing their colors



Timing is everything

So the plan for the spring of 2011 includes installing a tracking solar system that will be connected to the grid in hopes of getting an income, the reconstruction of the deck to make that more user friendly, and because both of these projects will result in the massive devastation that just is heavy equipment to any of the landscape that we haven't already managed to destroy in anticipation of this , I guess we will have to redo the grounds as well..........including, of course, a new and improved vegetable garden.

So in the middle of all this deconstruct and reconstruct, with all the sand, dust, ruts and mud that accompany that, all of which is being lovingly brought indoors by 2 big dogs and a cat, here's me trying to save, identify and relocate any plants worth keeping, and it's springtime, so of course I'm buying more still. So I now have a house that needs sweeping at least 3 times a day, numerous plants in waiting, in various locations throughout the property that need water , a veg garden that needs planting, a truck load of lumber that needs to be stained, a retaining wall to be built and a railing that I need to build too.......all of this with a deadline of July 9th weekend, our annual weekend long Pitfest camp over party which this year is doubling as Bob the Builders Birthday Bash..........so planning for that needs to occupy some of my grey matter as well.

Maybe it was the heat..........or sheer exhaustion.........or possibly one well deserved beer more than required..........but somehow, in the midst of all this we decided........

THAT WE NEED TO GET CHICKENS!!!????

....and let's get some ducks too ( in hindsight, I can say that this was probably the beer talking )

Anyways, long before the idea of this blog ever existed, I started to keep a journal about this new adventure in livestock, and remember.....I have No experience with this chicken thing AT ALL!!

So I'm going to post the journal entries with dates, which of course will not match up with the posting dates of this blog.............you're just going to have to deal with that because the other thing that I never got around to doing was taking the Blogging 101 course.